It was another day of doing the Disappearing Act at work. I got to work as usual this morning with all my audition supplies in tow. I decided since it was an afternoon call I would see if I could get away with leaving the laptop at home. I didn’t wake up in time to curl my hair, and it didn’t make much sense anyway since the call wasn’t until 2 PM, so I figured I’d curl my hair at some point during the day.
I knocked out A TON of work at the day job and also had to take minutes for a meeting this morning. I left work around 12:50 to go sign up for the call.
I arrive at 1:09 PM in the holding room, just in time to be lucky number 100 on the non-union list. Yipee. The monitor tells me to come back at 3 PM for the 2 PM call. I think I can get by with coming a little later. Timing is everything with these chorus calls, and it’s always a gamble. I pick up lunch at and go back to work.
I mentioned I didn’t get to curl my hair yet. When I got back to my desk I re-read the details on the call and found out the playhouse was casting “Chicago” and “Hairspray.” I was kind of hoping I could get away without curling my hair since it’s starting to get a little gross. Day after day of tons of hairspray and heat is taking its toll on my blonde locks. It’s turning into a blonde bird’s nest. But how can I go to a call for a theatre casting “Hairspray” without big hair?
Seeing as there are over 100 girls on the list, I don’t think there’s going to be room at the audition studio to plug in my curlers. I decide to curl my hair at work. The only outlet I have is at my desk. So, I plug in my hot rollers under my desk and put them in while I do some more data entry. Don’t believe me? My friend Jim took a picture to prove it:
Yes, hot rollers, at my desk, at the day job. It was awesome that a meeting of like 15 people let out right across from my cube right after I did this. I can just see my exit interview – “employee fired for excessive grooming in work space.”
I got some weird looks and comments, but I’ve always been the eccentric one at work as it is.
I end up leaving to get back to the call a little late. I get there at 3:16. He’s passed my number. How they managed to pass #100 I have no idea, but I manage to get into the last non-union group.
They are dancing the Equity girls and I find that the non-union girls are getting “typed.” Basically, they are going to take 30 of us in at a time and decide based on looks alone which of us they want to have stay and dance. Fun stuff. They are on the last Equity group and then are going to type us, so I figure I can stay instead of going back to work. I put on my dance clothes and get dolled up to go be “typed.”
I was kind of wrong. At the last minute, they decide that they are first going to have the Equity dancers they have picked sing before we even get to go in. That’s another 45 minutes at least. It’s 4:26 now so I figure it’s not worth it to go back to work anyway. I get on my iPhone to answer some work emails.
A little after 5 PM they start to finally take in the first non-union group. I’m in the last group. After the first group goes in we start to think they are taking kind of a long time for just typing them. We find out they are actually having that group dance. Thanks for the warning, guys! The other girls and I start to warm up.
The first group comes out and we find out they have each one do a time step and two pirouettes and then they choose. Lovely…
I finally go in. They are having us all do the time step and the pirouettes one at a time, in heels, on the slick wooden floors.
My biggest mistake of the day was not realizing when I saw a bunch of the girls ahead of me slipping on the floor that I should have wet my shoes. I do pirouette drills weekly at dance class. I can do two pirouettes in my sleep. So I thought.
I flubbed the end of my second pirouette. Travesty. This never happens. I know I could have nailed it if I had put some water on my shoes. They only keep two tall brunettes from my group. After my group, they dance the non-union girls at 5:55 PM – the call is supposed to end at 6 PM.
In the end, I spent about 3 hours away from work on this call to be in the room for 5-10 minutes and get cut.
I leave to go to my Theatre Dance class that night determined to kick my own butt at pirouette drills. The next time they ask me to do two pirouettes in a chorus call I’m going to do a triple or quadruple turn into a huge battement, flick them off, and walk out of the room. Hire this, bitches.
Things I learned from today’s chorus call:
- Dress for the audition, especially if it is a call for “Chicago” – even if it means wearing nothing more than fishnets, a thong, and pasties just to show that you can under-dress everyone. Apparently, even if you don’t have it you should flaunt it when it comes to musical theatre calls.
- If you are asked to do something as dumb as 2 pirouettes to make a cut, find a way to make yourself stand out. Try not to let that way be falling on your face, but if it happens, make it work. Above all, don’t stand out because you didn’t put WATER on your SUEDE BOTTOMED LA DUCAS just because the other girls didn’t. Always look out for yourself.
- BRING A BOOK. Sweatpants are also good. The hallways get cold and they expect you to dance at the drop of a hat.
I think I’m going to make a post with a list of what’s in my audition bag in case anyone is wondering. It *might* occasionally include the a flask. You think I’m kidding, but you’re talking to a girl who wore hot rollers at her day job.
Tomorrow is the call for “Cutman” at the Goodspeed. Apparently they are looking for beautiful statuesque “Ring Girls” and African American boxer types. Umm… yeah. I guess I should walk in wearing a bikini and hold a sign with a number over my head? “Million Dollar Baby” The Musical???
Oh, by the way, probably won’t come in handy tomorrow, but I totally bought some of those stupid nude fishnets, and I look awesome in them.